Soapy D. Clown

Our Crew of Performers

Send in the Clowns, Dummies, and Tramps Please

Below we’d like to introduce you to the crew that usually travels with Soapy. These talents and entertainers are here for the purpose of entertainment.

Though we each hold personal beliefs and opinions, and traveling together we’re pretty unified, we are not performing to debate, discuss, or promote ideologies.

We are hired to perform. The persons that hire our crew of performers may hold differing viewpoints of our performances. That’s ok. because laughter, life, and love for humanity is not discriminatory, people are.

Be sure to check out our Code of Ethics in order for complete clarity regarding hiring our performances.

Soapy De Clown

Soapy D. Clown

Soapy D. Clown Extraordinary the Third works daily to make sure the show is continually funny and interesting. Formerally working as a sales person, after his story

He is passionate about finding his one true love, Rayne Z. Auguste. He knows they’re destined to be together, and if only they could meet, Soapy is sure that Rayne will be his to have and to hold forever. (Rayne doesn’t even know Soapy is looking to marry her.) Soapy is sure that with Rayne it will be love at first sight.

Rayne Zephaniah Auguste

Rayne Z. Auguste

Rayne Z. Auguste is the Diva of the clown world. She takes fashion sense very seriously. Rayne has always dreamed of finding her one, true love, and for a clown that isn’t easy. Rayne knows that her destiny is in good hands and that the future is cheerful and optimistic.

Rayne, uses her laughter and beauty in the clown world to make the sun shine in her life. She believes everyone has brightness in them, and her job is to make it shine in everyone. She despises the constant presence of darkness lurking in every corner of the bright, beautiful world.

Screwtape · Underworld Boss


Screwtape’s main focus is pleasing his boss. He desires to rise in the ranks of the underworld and overthrow the supreme leader, and with his prize minion Wormwood, he knows he can manipulate him to corrupt humanity one person at a time.

Secretly, Wormwood is not all too fond of the corruption of humanity. His main vice is the marshmallow soufflé humans create in the village close by, and this aggravates Screwtape to know end. Appearing through UTI (Underworld’s Telecom Interface), Screwtape attempting to guide his minion Wormwood, continually lays out his plan to negatively impact earth’s population of humanity, which Screwtape despises because they’re so flawed and imperfect.

Suds Alexander Skunk

Suds A. Skunk

Suds A. Skunk claims he’s an angel sent from heaven to help Soapy through life. However, shanghaiing Soapy to run his campaign for president of the United States, and wanting voting rights for all animal kind shows who really needs the help here...

However, when Suds is around, it does display a great benefit to everyone involved, because the laughter tends to proceed any politics. As Soapy tries to determine if Suds is real, or that he Suds is who he says he is, he does prove one thing repeatedly, he’s got better hair than any politician around.

Wormwood · Screwtape’s Earthly Minion


It’s been interesting for Soapy to determine what kind of animal Wormwood is. He can’t truly come from the underworld and a minion of Screwtape, right? If the underworld really destroyed humanity, is Wormwood as a minion the best they can do, or are they really banking on their loose screw of Screwtape.

Wormwood is frustrated because he is in the position of being sent to earth from the underworld, and not wanting humanity destroyed because who would make him marshmallow soufflé? Wormwood also feels that humans are pretty cool as pets and when he is hungry he can order them to make his favorite dish.

Wormwood travels the Underworld Transport Intergalactic Systems (UTIs) to earth to corrupt humanity, he has asked for Soapy’s help to undermind his boss Screwtape and get marshmallow soufflé. Soapy does not realize that in advising Wormwood, he’s saving a lot of people’s lives. But it is all in a days work when you’re a clown.

All Images & Content ©2010 Soapy D. Clown