It was a fateful driver’s error, a rogue paint truck – bright with carnival colors and irony – screeched through 14th and Havana, colliding with Soapy in a splatter of neon disaster. Then the doctors removed the colorful collideascope while he was in a comatose state.
Soapy woke up weeks later, face covered in a Pollock-like mosaic, permanently dyed and distorted by industrial pigments, then bleached by the doctors. When he was discharged from the hospital, other problems soon arose too.As if losing his job, then the divorce, then the house, wasn’t bad enough, Soapy was diagnosed with ISeeThingsOfDisfunctionItis, a condition that causes visual hallucinations, except his hallucinations actually talked to him, and talked a lot. It was the skunk first that started everything.
Suds Z. Skunk · Is he real or not?
The skunk claims he saw it all happen, the truck hitting Soapy, and the aftermath that happened from high up on the clouds. Suds couldn’t believe the carnage that was played out on one man. Being the only skunk in history with shimmering wings (so he claims), a halo (Soapy claims it’s made of tin), and just simply wanting to help the clown that got hit by a paint truck, Suds was happy with limiting his earthly interactions with this clown, until Suds (the skunk) turned on the television and saw the interaction of newscasters and politicians weighed against truth. He had to interveine before it was too late.
A Skunk Running for President?
From the heavenly perspective Suds was used to, he didn’t realize how corrupt and hateful politics had become. That’s when he decided that he was going to run for president of the United States. ‘The war on wildlife’ between the humans and animals had gone far enough, and it was high time an animal do something about it. On top of that, he was going to help Soapy D. Clown by giving him a job, making him his senior campaign manager, which of course Soapy wants nothing to do with, because as a campaign manager, he stinks “worse then a two-bit skunk with diarrea”.
A New Political Party
Since our U.S. Constitution does not specify that a political candidate must be human, and the United States Constitution outlining qualifications for holding office (e.g., age, residency), but never addresses the issue of species. Suds Z. Skunk is starting the formation of the Fur & Scale Party to represent animal kind. The primary issue is the promotion of animal suffrage of the Fur and Scale party, being that the likes of some politicians made voting and ‘representing constituents’ a lifelong career, not even a skunk could stink as bad as some of them.This new political party will promote animal suffrage (voting rights for intelligent animal species - except snakes, like some politicians, they bite anything regardless), wildlife area conservation,and equal rights regarding animal – human equality. Humanity has led to the extinction of many of the animal kingdom’s species, and it is high time this stops for the future of everyone’s survival.
The three-blind-mice have been sung about since the year 1609. As time has passed for four hundred years, you’d of thought that it would be rare for a species to survive that long. Until you meet Grigori Mouse.Grigori Mouse, the last surviving member of the three-blind-mice, has survived for over 400 years. As Soapy D. Clown slept at his local bus stop bench in order to get some shut-eye, Grigori was there and crawled onto Soapy’s belly to get some much needed rest too. Their chance meeting is one that legends are made of (think Batman and the Joker with fur and make-up).
It’s hard to find a peaceful place to rest for a mouse. What we haven’t told you about Grigori while he is sleeping is that Grigori is quite the autograph hound. For four-hundred years he’s collected autographs and has many interesting ones. From William Shakespeare to the Wright Brothers, George Washington stationed at valley forge fighting the British for America’s independence, to G. Gordan Libby arrested during the Watergate scandal. Grigori has bullied autographs out of the best of them.How does a blind mouse do this? Grigori is only legally blind, meaning he can see a little bit. With Grigori being 400 years old, collecting autographs is getting harder and harder to do, and why he is so honored to meet Soapy D. Clown, and can coerce Soapy to collecting the autographs for him. Unfortunately with Grigori’s poor eyesight, mistaken identity is a factor of his modern autograph hounding. With all sense of time and era being lost, Grigori doesn’t realize that time has passed and many of those he ‘sees’ have passed also.
Grigori gets excited seeing people he thinks he recognizes, because Grigori only speaks in mouse, which is basically grunts and squeaks to human ears, but is actually words to a clown’s ears, causes Grigori to get the autograph of many real and fictional characters throughout history.
Soapy & Crew Can Come Entertain You!
Interested in having Soapy & Crew come and entertain at your child’s or your party? Let’s Make this happen! We’re so excited to enjoy the event or party with you. Whether as a solo act or bringing his puppeteers with him to bring his characters to life, Soapy D. Clown can unashamedly bring your event to life with hope, laughter, and a touch of love cause the party to come alive.Please fill out the hire us form and let us know that you’re considering us for your next event.
